Posts Tagged ‘throwing food’

Feeding time at the Zoo

Wednesday, February 20th, 2013



I don’t know about you, but at my house, feeding time is endlessly entertaining. Not for me, but for anyone standing around watching the chaos that is dinner time, it is hilarious.

The problem is, I don’t see the funny side.  And I am far too embarrassed by the horrid table manners of my children to invite anyone over to share this precious time with me.

It starts with the demands for food. In my house this begins at about 4pm, the 5.30am start contributes to the whole day being much, much earlier than it should. So instead of snacks, I starve my children so they eat dinner. Sometimes it even works.

Generally by this time I have tried to pretend to give the wild child some choice about what he is eating, you know bacon and egg rice or tuna pasta. (It is gourmet in our house, let me tell you. In fact if Masterchef really wants to challenge their contestants, tell them to prepare something that the whole family will eat, in ten minutes, with a whinging baby on one hip, that is super healthy and actually interesting. Good luck.)

Dinner is presented. Bubba gives it one swipe with his hand and his bowl ends up on the floor. Wild child lies face down on the table protesting, hair goes in delicious dinner. Dog tries to lick the dinner off the floor as I catch the spilling cup of water from wild child now moving head out of dinner and into drink. So, the dog gets yelled at, the bubba pulls his bib off and gets served his dinner from the floor back in the bowl. He gets a spoon, I get a spoon, the wall cops the next two spoonfuls. Now I have my head on the table with both children laughing at me and not eating very much at all.

And then the pooing begins. Always at dinner time. Wild child runs off needing to do a poo, bubba starts concentrating, already doing a poo. I wipe one bum, change another bum, wash my hands and we attempt dinner again. Games, songs, races, bribes, threats, eventually most of it is out of the bowls, some in tummies, lots on the floor and a bit in the dog’s mouth.

Hilarious I know.  Now I just wish I could see the funny side of it. Maybe at 5 in the morning when they wake up hungry, the true comedy of this will really shine through.

Some how I doubt it.

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